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  • Punography
 
I tried to catch some fog. I mist.
 
When chemists die, they barium.
 
Jokes about German sausage are the wurst.
 
A soldier who survived mustard gas and pepper spray is now a seasoned veteran.
 
I know a guy who’s addicted to brake fluid. He says he can stop any time.
 
How does Moses make tea? Hebrews it.
 
I stayed up all night to see where the sun went. Then it dawned on me.
 
The girl said she recognized me from the vegetarian club, but I never met herbivore.
 
I’m reading a book about anti-gravity. I can’t put it down.
 
I did a theatrical performance about puns. It was a play on words.
 
They told me I had type A blood, but it was a Type O.
 
A dyslexic man walks into a bra.
 
Why were the Indians here first? They had reservations.
 
Class trip to the Coca-Cola factory. I hope there’s no pop quiz.
 
Energizer Bunny arrested: Charged with battery.
 
I didn’t like my beard at first. Then it grew on me.
 
What do you call a dinosaur with an extensive vocabulary? A thesaurus.
 
When you get a bladder infection, urine trouble.
 
What does a clock do when it’s hungry? It goes back four seconds.
 
I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger. Then it hit me!
 
Broken pencils are pointless.
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